Wednesday, January 19, 2011


Here we go! It is past time to transition Henry from the crib over to the big boy bed. Yep, we have been here before. He slept really well in his firetruck. Mommy got an awesome deal on it, and he loved it! Then, he learned a new skill. Opening doors. Once he figured that out, he wouldn't stay in bed. I gave up and put him back in the crib. He can climb out of it if he wants, but at night, he never does.

I think it may be a comfort thing. Maybe he likes the feeling of being closed in by the crib. Protected by it even. Maybe it keeps the bad things out for him. He has, in the past week, slept in the toddler bed once. I had to lay with him until he went to sleep. I won't complain about the sweet snuggles. :) Sometime through the night though, he climbed into his crib, but only after dragging his arsenal of sleep equipment and getting it in there somehow.

Sleep equipment: pillow, fringed blanket laid against left side of the body, sock monkey in the crease of the left elbow, cup in left hand, Daddy doll in crease of right elbow, and "the cowboy blanket" laying on top. The cowboy blanket is a hideous wool blanket that belonged to his Daddy. Its heavy and I assume that is what he likes about it.

I gave up and just started putting him in the crib again. I can no longer do this, as he is beginning to break it apart again. Theres probably something dangerous about him handing me a giant screw in the morning. I'm sure thats what the CPSC would say.

I will start by laying with him until he falls asleep. Gently getting him more used to it. Hopefully he will only climb to the (un)safety of his crib a few more nights. By next week I hope to have the crib completely out of his bedroom and replaced with another toddler bed. I will keep 2 in there so that he can move at night if he feels the need.

This is the most gentle way of forcing him into a bed that I can figure out in my mind.

My ultimate goal will be to get him and sister to share a room.  Baby steps, mama. Baby steps.

Night 1 (because in case you haven't noticed, I blog before bed at night and just publish the next day): It was horrible. But, we'll keep trying!!!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Judge Judy has nothin' on Mamas....

I have a lot of friends with children. Who am I kidding? I have maybe two friends that don't and that is only because one of them is a couple still expecting and another is a couple who has fertility issues. I'm often bombarded with emails, text messages, and the obligatory Facebook post about what wonderful things their children are doing today. I need to do this. I need to make it a point to share one new thing that my kids do every, single, day. I don't do it often enough. It is now a challenge to myself at before I sleep at night, to think of one good thing that each of my children did to make my day brighter.

Amazingly, this is now being mocked in the blogging world and Facebook alike. I feel like its becoming a bad thing to share milestones, and don't dare say that you are "blessed" because then you're a liar who pretends that nothing is wrong in life. Perhaps those people just don't want to share the "wrong", but instead of people thinking of it that way, they see it as someone's attempt at making life look perfect. So am I now supposed to post all of the crap things that happen in our house daily? My friends, I would clog your news feed and RSS like a barracks toilet on Mexican night at the chow hall. Want me to post only the good? I hate to say it, but on some days, I get in my slump and I see no good going on. OHHHH, you want a nice, politically-correct, mixture of the good and bad of life!! I get it!

Heres the thing about blogging. Your blog is YOURS. You post the good, you post the bad, you post them both and there you have.....I'll stop myself from breaking out into song here. Some people only post the good. On the contrary, in blogging and on Facebook, some people only post the bad. I find though, that I have those people on my news feed or my followed blogs for a reason. I am intrigued.

What I'm saying is that if someone wants to post their Happy McHappyFace all day, everyday, why are other mamas complaining about it? I assure you, they have bad in their life. They just don't share it with the world. And if that gives other mamas some sort of false sense about the blogger's life and their own, then so be it. We can't save 'em all. There are a few, well-loved by many thousands of people blogs out there, that I cannot stand to read. So, I don't read them. Don't read it if it the only emotion you get out of it is anger towards the person and their so-called perfection. We all know its a dream world, but hey....if I'm having a dream world kind of day, no one better burst my bubble. If you don't like someone's happy, don't taint it with your sad or angry.

I will continue to blog our days. Good days, bad days, whatever I feel like posting that day. Mostly good. Because I am blessed. I owe all of our days to God. When need be, I will praise him. I will even *gasp* praise him publicly. There are joys with Autism, not just the horrible things that people read and hear. My ability to see those joys are what makes me blessed. I'm praying that He will help me find the ability to share ALL of the good that Autism has brought into our lives.

Unless there is something that can actually be done to help out a fellow mama, why are we judging each other so harsly? We must be the warriors that we want to be in our child's life, whether they have special needs or not. We must show them that we will not make fun of others for any reason. Whether it be a false sense of what reality is or the doom and gloom kind of human. We must be the example of what we want them to become.

Monday, January 17, 2011

Autism and the "terrible twos"

This morning, my sweet boy is in his room, working on his new favorite past time, and singing a sweet song. I have no clue what any of the words are or what song he is singing, but a mama could get used to this. As he does this though, I can't help but to wonder when the next tantrum is coming. It won't be long. A page in his phone book will turn when he doesn't want it to, or a song will come on his radio that he doesn't like, or his sister will look at him.

All mothers expect tantrums, here, we live them. Everyone in the house is subject to it. Everything is everyone's fault. The tantrums here last an hour, sometimes longer. Redirection and ignoring just don't cut it when your child focuses on the one thing that pissed him off. We even get through with one screaming and kicking match, only to have Henry think about it an hour later and start all over again. How do you redirect a child who doesn't comprehend when you try to tell him or her that "its ok". You don't. You let them have a go at it for a little while, making sure the other children are not within kicking distance. You try to rock the child throwing the tantrum. You gently squeeze their chest or put on their compression vest if you can actually manage that. Personally, I let Henry throw a fit for about 10-15 minutes and then I try the other things. I feel that he needs to get some of that anger out somehow, so for now, at the age of 2, we just tantrum it out. Then, I pick him up and walk around while swaying. We sing songs (Mommy sings way off key). His favorites are "Froggy Went 'a Courtin'", "ABCs", "Firework", and "Boots".

I'd be willing to say that about 30% of our day is spent listening to or feeling the wrath of a tantrum. Know what? Most days, I don't mind. The good far outweighs the "bad". The sweet mutter of "cup" or a song of "I love you", makes it all completely worth it. :)